Hawaii Versus The OC

Hawaii is a place that is unlike no other in the world. For one, it is in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. For two, the people are genuinely Original, unlike no other. Case in point, my wife and my two boys, Joshua and Jeremy were at a Keiki children's fair in 2000, when we lived on Oahu (we still have a house in the valley, Manoa Valley, which is the subject of an entirely different post). My wife saw a local woman eating a slice of a seven layer chocolate cake. It was the most insane looking chocolate cake that the both of us had ever seen. Her interest piqued, my wife asked the woman "Is that cake good?" and the woman replied, "Delicious, want to try?" Amazing. I don't know of any other place on this earth where a total stranger would offer another total stranger a taste of her cake. What really took the cake (pardon the pun) was about 40 minutes later, I asked a man, who was eating slice of the same 7 layer cake, if the cake was good, and he replied "It tastes really good. You like to try?" think about it. That is two total strangers offering two total strangers a taste of their food.

Contrast that with California. We were at Fry's Electronics over the weekend and Jeremy had to use the restroom. The restroom is located past the massive line that is always at Fry's on the weekend. SO we went through the line, excusing ourselves as we went. We got to this old couple and asked to be excused and the old man replied, what for, and sort of blocked our path. My wife and I replied because we had to go to the bathroom and the old man decided to direct us to bathroom, explaining how we needed to go around and not through the line. Well the bathroom is located at the front of the line and he knew it and we knew it and we were making the shortest route to it, but the old man wanted to be an asshole that day. I wanted to tell him to fuck off, but my children were around, so I muttered what an asshole he was as we past. It really was none of his business why we wanted to pass him, so he can fuck off.

The OC. For those who are unfamiliar with the OC, or Orange County, it is the county that sits between San Diego and Los Angeles counties. Orange County really has a very fast paced lifestyle with plenty of assholes, nice people, immigrants, illegal immigrants, and white people. Filipinos are pretty scarce here, but there are a lot of Vietnamese and Mexicans in the OC, as well as white people and republicans. The old man at Fry's, he is your typical OC asshole. And there are a lot of them here. The county is divided primarily into two parts, North county and South County. North county is an older part of the county, more established with a matching decaying infrastructure. South County is newer, with better roads and newer areas, but therein lies the difference. Folks in South County tend to be of the younger set, and supposedly have higher incomes than those in North County. The women in South County have a higher propensity of plastic surgery than the women of North County. That is just my opinion, having lived both in North County and South County. There are a lot of plastic people in South County. Is OC like the OC, the TV show? Well, yes and no. Yes Newport Beach is full of huge houses and Donzi's and women like the new Mrs. Nicol. To a lot of people, Newport Beach is a study in unobtainable. Old money living on the beach or on the harbor. Really Newport Beach is old money.

I work in Newport Beach and also surf in Newport Beach everyday. I've always enjoyed surfing in Newport versus Huntington. The waves seem to have a better shape. So I am in Newport everyday. and you see your typical newport clone in Newport beach. I call them clones because, almost everyone looks the same in Newport Beach. It is as if the guys and the girls have been cloned. A Typical Newport looking guy drives a raised truck, wears black wraparound sunglasses, a shaved or close cropped hairdo, and calf length shorts. A pit bull, Rottweiler, Akita, or similarly aggressive dog is an optional fashion accesory (Visit the local animal shelters and you'll know what I mean, dogs as accessories is ridiculous, but its all part of the macho mindset of the type that hangs down in Newport). A typical Newport girl is blond or brunette (Asian women are somewhat rare down in the numbered streets), nice body, and active. These clones are looking for one thing, and that is to score. And they do. Oftentimes, I'll be driving through early in the morning for a surf and see a woman going to her car, hair a mess, usually wearing some revealing sweat pants or some such, heading home after a night of partying. Mind you that these sights are pretty much exclusive to West Newport, as this is the party side of newport, what I call the barrio, because the descriptions of the people that I gave to you previously are of the West Newport crowd, which is primarily migrant, meaning they are primarily renters. Dennis Rodman had his bachelor pad in West Newport. The other side of Newport is where the monied folks reside. Dean Koontz is a resident of Newport's Balboa Island, which is exclusive. Kobe Bryant, who beat the rape charge is also a resident of Newport, though he resides in Newport Coast, which is the setting for the fictional TV show, The OC. Newport though is by far my favorite city in Orange County. Is it like The OC? yes and no.